You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Plan B is the new Plan A
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
