She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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