My hand turned me down
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
