He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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