Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
