Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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