Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I'm sobbing to NWA
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
