Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
