I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
