Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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