True but thats because hes a fetus.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
