Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
