Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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