I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize
