She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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