gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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