Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize
