no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
