I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
