I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
