By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Houston, we have a squirter
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
