she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
