She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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