I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
