worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
