What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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