I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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