Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
