we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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