She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
