Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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