I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
