The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize