we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
