Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
