Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
