Your dad touched me again.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
home. puking in laundry basket.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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