O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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