Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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