Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
