That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
