i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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