yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
