I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
