Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize