i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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