She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
