i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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