we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
