1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.