We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize